Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Cinderella - From the heart

So, a quick update. Kathryn's appetite picked up over the weekend and she seemed to jump back on the bottle bandwagon. She also continues to chew on her hands with extreme gusto so we are giving her Tylenol to help with that. (We still think she may be teething, but have yet to see the little breakthrough!) Maddie and Greg finished working on Maddie's Derby car for her Derby Day with Dad coming up at school. She is super proud of it and I think it looks amazing. I still can't give away what it looks like since the derby is not til the 25th, but I will post pictures next week. Kathryn had a follow up today with Dr. Stansell for her last Synagis shot of the season. She did not like the shot at all, but a huge hug from mom seemed to calm her down within a few minutes! She was also up to 9 pounds 13 ounces on their scale.

For the first time in a while, I wanted to take a few minutes and actually write a heartfelt blog entry today. Most days I barely have enough time to just write about what is going on with us, but today I feel different. With being back to work, I sometimes find that there isn't enough time in the day for anything. I am up at 5:00 (or at least my alarm is) - it's more like 5:30 for me. That usually means that I have to rush to get ready because I have to leave the house by 6:30 to be at work by 7:00. I try in that hour to get dressed, get Maddie's clothes out, feed Kathryn, and any other household chore that quickly needs my attention. Then a quick kiss to each of the girls and to Greg and I am out the door speeding to work. Work starts at 7:00 and goes until 2:30 for me right now, so that I can leave at 2:30, head straight to Maddie's school and get home by 3:00 for Cheryl to head home to her family. (Most days, I get home closer to 3:15 and thankfully for me, Cheryl is so kind about my 15 minute late trend.) - Which by the way, I was never late before having two kids, and now I can never seem to be on time. Anyway, the afternoons are usually filled with drawing medicines, making formula, occasional doctor visits, reading mail and email, and hanging out with the girls - unfortunately usually in that order. The few extra hours I have in the afternoon with them before Greg gets home seems to fly by!! Before I know it, it's 6:00, Greg is home, it's bottle time, and time to fix dinner, eat dinner, give Maddie a bath and try to wind down for the night. Usually by about 9:30 I get a few minutes to myself at which time I try to decide whether I want to play with Kathryn, spend time with Greg, watch a TV show, read my book, read my magazine, blog, surf the computer, or any number of other mom or wife tasks before I get sleepy in the next 30 minutes and have to fall asleep in order to start all over the next morning. Isn't all this activity supposed to be such a blessing?

And then today, I realized that no, that's not the blessing at all. The blessing is my husband and my children and the wonderful family we are building. Greg came home the other day and mentioned to me a song that he had heard in the car on the way home. Since he knows me so well, he told me to wait to hear it because he knew it would make me cry. Like normal, I went about a busy last few days before I even took the time to listen to it. At work of all places, I pulled it up on the internet and like Greg suspected, it pulled at my heartstrings and brought tears to my eyes. I think it was a song that I needed to hear. Steven Curtis Chapman sings Cinderella about his relationship with his daughters. Here's the simple lesson I was reminded of from listening to the song: I need to remember the importance of showing up in the moment and not just worrying about the ones to come. The song reminded me that we need to stop and focus on the little things with our little ones because time passes faster than I would have ever imagined. Maddie reminds me each day that she is now a big kid (and not a baby) even though I remember holding her like I do Kathryn. Too many days I spend trying to get everything done, so I can sit down and enjoy reading a book to Maddie or holding Kathryn and making silly sounds with her, when really those are the things that need to be done first. Everything else can wait! I remember one Sunday afternoon while Kathryn was in the hospital, my mom came to pick up Maddie and take her to the park so I could do some things around the house before going back to visit Kathryn. As soon as Maddie was out the door, I cried because I realized that I should have taken Maddie to the park and let the other stuff wait!

So. . . . this is my admission of not putting the right things first all the time AND my commitment to showing up in the moment! I refuse to miss anymore Cinderella moments and I can't wait to see Greg and his princesses dance for quite some time!

Check out the song:

Faithfully, Kelly

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